A Better Version of You

The differences between raising the first and second child are beginning to become clearer to me. I'm surprised by some of the things I've let Amelia have/eat/do that I'd never dreamed of doing with Asher. I just know he'll throw this in my face one day. I've even resorted to having imaginary conversations about this. However, they usually end with me forgoing all attempts at reason and screaming "just wait til you have kids mister, you'll see!"

But for Amelia, while being a little sibling has it's perks, it's not all rose colored life all the time. We'll exchanged letting go of some quirky rules for tightening up in other areas of life. And as hypocritical as it may sound, we'll probably end up raising our son and daughter differently based not only on their personalities but also on their GENDER. (Yep, I said it...let the stones fly.)

All those big scary parenting questions are still a ways off thank goodness, but at least for now, however I've come up with three things we've allowed Amelia to do, that we would have never dreamed of doing with Asher.

1. Eating - Amelia really got the delicious end of the stick in this area. I can absolutely guarantee that Asher didn't touch McDonald's until after he was two. And it wasn't even me who gave him his first bite of this horrifically addictive, yet delicious fast food. Amelia, on the other hand, eats McDonald's when Asher does. She's learned that if she screams loud enough and long enough we'll give her almost anything that's on his plate. This also explains why Asher called plain Cheerios "O's" and Amelia's "O's" are Honey Comb. Some nights Amelia just spends dinner time walking around the table asking for "bites" from our plates. I realize at some point that this is going to come back to haunt me, but right now, I just want to eat in peace.



2. Television - That's right. The good ol' idiot box. When we moved to Oklahoma Asher was about 18 months old. We didn't have a television in the living room before then so he never had an opportunity to watch cartoons. Around two we allowed him one Wiggles episode/movie a day which he watched while I made dinner. We have always made an effort to tightly control his screen time, however, based on his love for all things screeny (TV, internet, movies, iPhone, Leapster, etc.) I fear that might have backfired. Amelia, on the other hand is already watching TV. If Asher's watching a movie I can't blindfold her as she wanders around the living room. Unfortunately, I can't just blame Asher for her television watching, I have used the television as a mother's helper at times, even for something as non-emergent as checking e-mail. And do you honestly think she's nappy while I'm writing this?


3. Exploration - Asher walked later than Amelia and definitely fell less often. If I wasn't two inches away from him at all times, I think my head would have exploded. Amelia absolutely gets more freedom in this area. In some ways, I think it's good. She has had more opportunities to explore the world and enjoys our walks around the neighborhood and park. However, with that freedom also comes consequences. She's had skinned knees and more tears than I recall Asher ever having. Plus, it seems to us that all her practice isn't doing very much good. She is just as clumsy as ever.

So there you have it, three things that Amelia gets to do, that Asher can use as emotional weapons against me. I think I may have to dismantle this blog before he gets wise. On the other hand, it'll be good to show Amelia ALL the wonderful things she got to do that we never would allow with Asher. Hopefully she'll consider it a fair trade for her curfew when she's 16.

Candy Girl

I smoked my last cigarette Saturday night so Elijah bought me a "distract yourself" candy jar.

My forray into smoking cost me $28, a touch of self esteem and 20 or so mosquito bites. The first day off was fine and I don't anticipate another relapse anytime soon. I actually think allowing myself this indulgence was good for me (not in a healthy sort of way, of course). It's just that I'm always so concerned with withholding from myself. Be it food, a break from the kids, or any number of other little indulgences, I rarely allow myself a true break. Smoking was definitely something I did ALL for me. There was no one else I was even considering. So, I knew when it was over, when I had had my fill of "me time." I was even sort of relieved to finish the pack (because you don't just THROW AWAY a half full pack of cigarettes!).

We'll see how the week goes. The kids have been sickly, so that really isn't helping on the stress side of things, but rarely is life without it's complications and stressors. Plus, I now have Blo-Pops to help me cope!

Pride

While taking Asher to school this morning "Slide" by the Goo Goo Dolls was playing on the radio. It reminded me of watching Sesame Street with Asher when the Goo Goo Dolls were guests.

I had to post the video. Years ago, we recorded the song and watched it over and over again. It still makes me smile, so I thought I'd pass it on. Enjoy!

Up In The Air

I've completely stepped out of my reading comfort zone this year. I've always intentionally stayed away from the newest books, the bestsellers, that everyone is reading. I prefer the old standbys, works from long dead authors that have stood the test of time. Things usually found on a "100 books everyone should read" list. But seeing how this year's reading has turned out, I may be free of those dusty old books forever; once I finish my 100 books list, that is.

As it happens, I'm starting to believe that there actually is a pretty good reason for a book to be a national bestseller (Twilight and self help books aside).

I've also been hesitant to board the Afghanistan, Pakistan trend that's been pretty popular since 9/11. I've never really been interested in south-central Asia, so I didn't see the point. Once again, a book has proven me wrong. "The Kite Runner" by Khaled Hosseini was unpredictably riveting. I was fascinated by the story of this young boy's life and the journey that brought him to America, and then back to Afghanistan again. Granted, his childhood in Afghanistan was sheltered and his approach to his culture and religion rather moderate. Still, this author, through this deceptively simple story of self discovery, has opened my mind to something that I'm sure I'm narcissistically late in understanding. We are all just people, often caught between who we think we are, and who we think we ought to be, trying to build a life that we can be proud of.

What a novel idea, eh? Sometimes I can be so dense.

Do You Believe In Magic

We have BIG news in our neck of the woods.

We will soon have a new address and should be closing next month. I finally feel like we are settling in to our new state. The plan had originally been that we would stay in our house through the end of our lease. Once we sold our home in Oklahoma, I started looking at places out here just to get an idea of where we'd like to live and what the market was like. When we found this house it was just too good to pass up. Yet another upheaval, but I'm hoping this is the last home we buy...EVER.

Introducing what we refer to as our "Forever Home."