Matchy Matchy

Every Christmas I buy matching pajamas for the whole family. Elijah has been such a great sport about this, wearing his jammies with pride, not just on Christmas, but throughout the year. This year, we did a Disney theme in the hopes that it would inspire us to finally take our family Disney World trip!

Linking up with #iPPP and Wordful Wednesday.

Making Christmas

It's been almost a week since my last post and I apologize for my neglect. We've been so busy "Making Christmas" I just haven't been able to make time to write. I am hoping to be able to post little things during the next few weeks but am making no promises. I still haven't finished wrapping! However, since the holidays are mostly for the children, I figured I'd lean heavily on them for content, beginning with their pictures with Santa.

Asher sometimes has difficulty finding his "real" smile.

Amelia didn't scream, instead she was pretty much catatonic.

Due to the kids being sniffly, we didn't get our Santa pictures until last Sunday. I was sorry to miss the #SantaPix link-up with Letters for Lucas and Mommy of a Monster but I figured the last thing Santa needed during his busiest time was to catch something from my germ ridden babies. Here's hoping we'll get pictures done early enough for next year's linky!

I was able to link up with my favorite #iPPP though.

Santa's Going To Need Sudafed

All the little reindeer in my house are sick and so am I. This means that no one is getting adequately cared for and (more importantly) I've not been able to lay around the house feeling sorry for myself. Elijah has been a trooper though, he's the only one who isn't sick and he's pretty much keeping our shit together as much as he possibly can.

Of course this means he'll be sick over Christmas which will blow, but I'm grateful for his health right now. We'll deal with whiny sick husband when it comes to that.

For now, in honor of Taming Insanity's call for us to "Antler Up." I give you our version of sad, sickly reindeer.

Also linking up with iPPP because even when I'm sick, I'm an overachiever!

All I Want For Christmas Is...

I'm back again with Monday Listicles! It took me a while to get this up because I've been sleeping all day, but you still have time to make my Christmas wishes come true.

1. The perfect pair of brown leather boots.

2. A clean bathroom.

3. A ginormous TV over the mantle so I can watch A Christmas Story in front of the fireplace.

4. All of our home flooring completed.

5. To find that Amelia's completely potty trained and finished with diapers.

6. Dozens of frosted sugar cookies, picture perfect, not baked by me.

7. A weekend escape for Elijah and I with nothing planned but watching TV and eating takeout, just like we used to do before we had kids.

8. Snow. Just over Christmas Eve/Christmas Morning. (Note: It should be melted by the time I head for work that evening.)

9. To find that those pesky last ten pounds had finally disappeared for good.

10. The ability to keep the sweet Christmas memories alive year round.

I'm Thankful for iPhones

Without them, we wouldn't have great pictures of the year our turkey was too big for the roaster and had to be secured with duct tape!

Hope you all have a safe and happy Thanksgiving!

Linking this up with those wild and crazy 

iPhone Photo Phun gals:

 

Boo!

We had a wonderful Halloween! We went to a family Halloween party on Sunday and then, Monday, took the kids trick-or-treating with friends. I've sorted the haul and it looks like I'll be adding another few pounds to my waistline this winter. But I'm willing to sacrifice my figure in order to keep our dental bills down. I'm such a team player!

Here we are in all our Halloween finery.

Elijah went as a used car salesman. I went as myself a witch

The most adorable (and versatile) witch shoes ever!

Our little ladybug.

Asher was the Scream monster, but Amelia just called him "Scary"

Linking this up with those wild and crazy 

iPhone Photo Phun gals:

 

Also linking up with Four Plus an Angel and Sellabitmum!

Mother's Day Recap

I had a wonderful Mother's Day. Instead of gifts Elijah did all my chores for this week (my birthday week!) so I don't have laundry, cleaning or grocery shopping to do. It was the perfect week long gift.

We spent a quiet day at home. I had worked the night before so Elijah woke up early and a breakfast of biscuits with sausage gravy and mimosas was waiting for me when I walked in. I slept a few hours then was up in time for another home made meal. We finished the evening off with strawberry pie, a total favorite of mine, and had a nice early bedtime. It truly was a perfect day. The only thing I had to do was open the fancy, $13, bottle of wine we had with dinner. I am so grateful to have such a loving, serving family.

A Mother's Day Gift to Myself

I was recently introduced to an amazing website, The Shape of a Mother. The site collects photos and stories of women during pregnancy and after childbirth. Real photos, real women. Stretch marks and saggy breasts abound.

It was a wake-up call for me as I'm pretty resentful of my post baby body. I'm not one of those women who loves the imperfections because they remind me of my children. I often long for my previously perky body and have even looked into surgical options in order to get back to how I once looked. For the record, all this insecurity and self loathing has nothing to do with my husband's view of me. In fact, he's told me several times how much he loves my body and I am confident in his love.

No, these feelings are all me. And it's all so foreign. I don't have the necessary skills to combat the way I feel in my own skin. I'm not looking for compliments, I just want to open a dialogue, give my physical history and maybe (hopefully) find a way to be proud of what my body has accomplished instead of resentful for not being able to look like the air-brushed images that surround me.

In high school, I don't ever recall being insecure about my body. I mean, sure I didn't have much of a figure until after 19, but I was always thin (5'5," 115-ish), looked good in pretty much whatever was in style (though I seriously lacked fashion sense and still do), and didn't feel uncomfortable about wearing a bathing suit.

That's not to say that my high school years lacked angst. It's just that, my teenage angst came from my complete and total cluelessness about boys in general (although having 7 brothers really should have prepared me better) and the fact that I was always the friend boy's talked to about the hottie they wanted. It was a pathetic cycle I was doomed to repeat for years, but like I said, at least I didn't have body image issues, right?

You might say I bloomed after high school when I finally got on the pill (hooray for boobs!) and that's when I appreciated my body the most. I had gained a little weight but in all the right places and was more than happy about how I looked. And can you blame me?

The kids in the photo belong to a family I lived with when I was a nanny.

Ignore the makeup, I was too hopeless for words.

Fast forward to me joining the USAF and shipping off to basic training. Throughout my first year or so, I gained muscle, confidence and about 6lbs. Putting me at 5'5" and 121 on my wedding day. After marrying Elijah there was the usual "fat and happy" gain of a couple of pounds but for the most part I stayed trim.

Three years into our marriage we decided to start a family. We had such an easy time getting pregnant, and I had a safe, low risk, 'born to have babies' type of pregnancy. The ONLY complication was my constant craving for Pizza Hut's pan pepperoni pizza and the fact that inhaling them over 40 weeks caused me to gain 65 lbs. That's right, when I weighed in for Asher's delivery I was 186 lbs.

Please don't try to tell me I don't look "that big" in this photo. This was taken in July 
when I was five months along; he wasn't born until November.

It took me a year of dieting and hard work but I was able to lose the weight after having Asher however, my body didn't look the same. I don't have noticeably large stretch marks or anything like that, it's just that things seemed out of place. I had Amelia almost six years later and was the biggest I'd ever been during her pregnancy. I weighed 192 at my OB appointment the week before I was induced.

This picture was taken three days before I was induced with Amelia and yes me standing in 

front of a whale was the 'look' that the photographer (Elijah) intended.

They didn't even weigh me when I checked into the hospital. 
The nurse just quietly whispered the question during my intake interview.

Now I am the proud mother of a seven year old son and two year old daughter. I have lost most of the extra baby weight and am now at 133-ish, depending on when I weigh myself, which I do, at least once a day...sometimes more. I can wear a 6 or an 8 but can no longer go without a bra which especially bothers me in the summer when the new line of sun dresses I'm not able to wear comes out.

This post isn't about weight, it isn't about how I look or weigh COMPARED to you. It's about how I feel about myself and why. Although I weigh more than I did ten years ago, I don't consider myself overweight. I'm active, I've run half marathons, I've had two children. Yet, at times, I still feel fat and awkward. I feel like everyone can see my gut. I'm embarrassed to wear a swimsuit and I hate to be naked. What frustrates me the most is that I realize that these feelings rob me of joy. They take all my other accomplishments and talents and downgrade them. Making my worth be based solely on what I see in the mirror. These feelings taint the miracle of my pregnancies and childbirth stories.

I don't want to feel this way. I'm trying to be kinder when I look at myself. I try not to compare myself to other, smaller, seemingly better put together women. I'm spending more time running because it's something I love and it gives me a sense of physical accomplishment. I'm trying to be proud that what I perceive as a misshapen, imperfect body can run 13 miles, work 12 hours at a time caring for others and is still is able to run a home and raise a family.

So, this Mother's Day that's what I'll try to focus on. I'll try to remind myself how miraculous it is that my body created this amazing family and that I'm still healthy enough to actively participate in this wonderful journey. I'll try to remember that the body I have now is actually perfect in it's imperfections.

That's going to be my Mother's Day gift to myself.

Hoppy Birthday Baby!

We celebrated Amelia's 2nd birthday over Easter Weekend. Her grandparents were coming down for the party so we decided it'd be more fun to have them over for the egg-citing festivities as well as her birthday celebration. We grilled brats, beat on a pinata and had some ice cream cake (the staple of birthday parties in our house). It was a small gathering of friends and family that couldn't have been more perfect.

Thank You Easter Bunny!

Remember that commercial? In case you don't, I've linked it. Wasn't it super awesome?!



After the egg hunt, I spent far too long trying to get my kids to stand with their baskets and say "Thank You Easter Bunny!" They totally didn't get it. They had no frame of reference for my request. And since we did the egg hunt in the front yard rather than the back (due to the fact that there were FOUR DOGS at my house and there was NO WAY I was hiding edible goodies in their bathroom) the neighbors got a good crazy lady show as well. Good fun.

There are thirteen pictures people! Thirteen pictures of the EXACT SAME POSE! We sat in the front yard trying over and over to get at least one good shot. The gods of photography did not smile on us, as you can see.

Oh well, I only have about 160 more photos of the holiday. I may do a photo link later this week because some of them are adorable and otherwise what's the point of taking 175 pictures of your kids in a 40 minute span if you aren't going to upload it for others to see? Anyway, I hope you all had a wonderful Easter weekend.

Happy Earth Day Earthlings!

Asher told me that he'd like to spend this year's Earth Day at a park picking up and recycling trash.  I'm not exactly sure how to go about searching for a dirty park, so we may just settle for playing at a clean one.

Either way, I wanted to leave you guys with some pretty pictures of the newly planted nature in our front yard. It's nothing spectacular, but it adds color and I actually helped with the planting. Seriously...I got my hands dirty rather than just sitting in my lawn chair, drinking beer and barking out orders. My how grown up I've become.

 

This type of work takes a lot of helpers so we were glad when Asher was willing to let us wheel him around while he ate his popsicle.

Seriously though, Asher was very helpful. He was most excited about spreading the fertilizer though, even after we explained to him what fertilizer actually was. Boys...yick!

Even though we were only planting a little patch, it took a lot of adorable muscle to get everything done. Thank goodness both are plentiful at my house!

 

I swear I helped! This picture was taken before the dirtying of the hands. Fact: Beer must be consumed before germy dirt is handled.

Almost done! The placement is all me people, all me!

And the final shot...well had I been a good blogger I would've gotten a final shot. Oh well, it looks good from the street...trust me.

Happy Earth Day!